Developing Discipline: Part 5 | Let's Get to Work!
In Part 4, we developed our vision for our life.
Now it’s time to get to work!
Key pieces of keeping to your habits and discipline are:
A sense of agency — the ability to choose within a set
How I actually started building a new life in Loveland
The first day I woke up in Loveland was July 4th. I was determined not to fall into my old habits of not making time for myself, but as we’ve discussed in the first 3 parts, I was initially very wary of my ability to develop this discipline and practice.
Working and scrolling through social media are much easier than actually taking the first step towards the vision of daily exercise, reading, learning, and discipline.
What does that even entail? I had no idea.
On those first days of Loveland Life, I had no idea what to do with the time from when I wake up between 5:30 and 6 until the day starts and we walk the dogs at 8. The first couple of mornings, I looked at my phone aimlessly, knowing I was wasting time, but not sure how else to go about it. At least I wasn’t at the computer working. That was a good step.
On July 6th, I took my first yoga class on the Peloton app. It was great, and it made me feel good, so from then on, I did some kind of ~20 min workout every day. Whether that was ballet, yoga, meditating, strength training, or pointework.
There was still the matter of the beginning of the day until the workout. I would wake up, and still look at my phone aimlessly for an hour. Better than 2 hours! Progress. And, all still better than starting to work.
I knew it still wasn’t ideal, but I couldn’t think of any better ideas. Maybe read a book? But I haven’t had much success reading in the past, so I was nervous to try.
So eventually I thought, maybe I’ll listen to a podcast and cross-stitch, I know I like that and have really enjoyed that combo in the past.
But then I opened the podcast app, and had no idea what to listen to. I asked myself “what do you find interesting?” and I drew a blank! I had no idea what to listen to. Overwhelmed with options, and no idea what I found interesting (also silently judging myself for not having a clue what I’d find interesting), I just picked something random.
After a few days of listening to random things, I finally had an idea of what would interest me. I wondered if I could pick Spanish up on a podcast. I used to love Spanish when I was a teenager. So I googled the best Spanish podcasts and found Coffee Break Spanish. Quickly, before bogging myself down in research, I just found it on my phone and hit play.
Afterwards, the judgement poured in!! “What a waste of time to just learn Spanish! You’re trying to run a business, you should be listening to something about finance, or business, or team-management or growth! Spanish is not a useful skill, you should really learn to listen to something that a real business person would listen to.”
P.S. What’s with that voice? I’m like …… you know I’m the one who feeds you right? Be nicer to me!
But, I did really enjoy the Spanish podcast, and I actually found it to be really incredibly fun, so I kept listening every day.
So now by late July, I consistently had this morning schedule down pat:
Wake up by 6am and then scroll aimlessly on my phone until 6:45
Listen to Spanish podcast and cross-stitch until 7:15
A little yoga practice or maybe a YouTube ballet barre until 7:45
Get dressed (and of course pick out earrings, which I’d been doing since January)
Take the dogs out at 8
Chat with my friend Julee until 9
Start working
Ok, improving!
But, what about that first 30 minutes of the day? That scrolling is not helpful ...
So I revisited the idea of reading. I had gained some confidence from the podcast experience that I could choose a podcast topic and enjoy it (and that it was ok if I chose a podcast that I didn’t like).
Bur, starting to read was just as hard as picking a podcast. Again, I asked myself “What are you interested in reading about?” and had no answer. No idea! And besides, what if I pick a book I don’t like? Did I waste that time? How do I know if I should keep reading it or put it down? Is it giving up if you don’t finish the book? And what if someone else thinks my book choice is dumb?
Omg, that voice. What the heck 😂
But, I’d become a little more aware of that little internal critic and felt more prepared to address it. So I just picked a book and didn’t think too hard! And I read it! And it was awesome. And then I picked another book. And another. And now I’ve finished 4 books!
And that little voice doesn’t judge me anymore when I’m picking a book, or a podcast, or a workout.
But man that first little bit was hard.
Now, about 3 months later, I can actually answer the question “What are you curious about today?” “What would feel good for your body today?”
And it’s so exciting to have the discipline to wake up and actually ask myself that question, and take time to answer it.
I think the way to being consistent is to listen to that voice, and give yourself the ability to explore how exactly you want to reach your personal goals and personal vision. At the beginning, it’s so hard and you just want someone to give you a list or tell you exactly what to do. But, I don’t think that actually will work long-term. I think it has to be for you, and you and you alone can know what is right for you.